Is gaming good or bad for children?
Michael Mosley writes the following about games in his book One Thing:
“The games that provide the strongest cognitive benefits appear to be action games that involve quick decision making, navigating around environments and finding visual targets. These kinds of games have been shown to increase grey matter in an area associated with abstract reasoning and problem solving. ‘We noticed that people who play high‑paced action video games tend to perform extremely well on our tests of attention – and the effect is particularly pronounced in people who play “shooter” games rather than participation or puzzle games,’ says Professor Bavelier.”
Gaming requires a child to actively use their brain—to solve puzzles or improve reaction speed. In Brain Rules for Baby, John Medina writes:
“Pay special attention to any media that allow intelligent interaction.”
Gaming is precisely such an activity that demands intelligent interaction. Gloria Mark makes a similar observation in her book Focus, with a caveat:
“The researchers concluded that gamers have more attentional resources. Gaming therefore seems to make people more skilled at using kinetic attention. Does that mean children or teenagers should game as much as possible to become super‑multitaskers? I’d say you don’t need to buy *Deathloop* for your kids. Recent research suggests it isn’t the games themselves that improve attention, but rather that people who play them tend to have innate cognitive abilities that increase the likelihood they’ll game. Maybe they’re the super‑multitaskers!”
So gaming does not automatically boost cognition; some children are drawn to games because they offer more challenge than passive TV. This is roughly confirmed by a study from the National Institute on Drug Abuse on gaming addiction:
“A study of nearly 2,000 children found that those who reported playing video games for three hours per day or more performed better on cognitive‑skills tests involving impulse control and working memory compared to children who had never played video games.”
Not all gaming is inherently harmful; it can have positive effects. Jon Haidt argues in The Anxious Generation that not all gaming is good for kids:
“My central claim in this book is that these two trends—over‑protection in the real world and under‑protection in the virtual world—are the major reasons why children born after 1995 became the anxious generation.”
Haidt focuses mainly on deliberately addictive online games that lead teen boys to live almost exclusively in a virtual world, missing essential social development such as face‑to‑face interaction.
A common argument is that gaming harms eyesight. Mosley again weighs in:
“Nor do they appear to be bad for your eyes. Professor Bavelier says young gamers appear to have superior eyesight. In fact, one study found that spending an hour a day on action games actually improved a form of vision called ‘contrast sensitivity.’ This is your ability to distinguish between shades of gray, and it naturally gets worse as we get older.”
Gaming can therefore have a positive effect on vision.
How do I let my children game?
As shown above, gaming isn’t automatically bad, but that doesn’t mean I hand a six‑year‑old a controller and let them play *Grand Theft Auto* all day.
To reap the positives I follow a few rules.
- Strict selection of permissible games. They must:
– Be age‑appropriate
– Not be (extremely) violent (no blood)
– Encourage cooperation - Limit the library so children aren’t overwhelmed and suffer choice‑stress.
- Gaming is done primarily on a large screen (TV) and preferably together with a sibling or parent. This forces joint decision‑making and makes gaming a shared experience. Conflict is expected; I intervene when needed, which teaches teamwork and consideration.
- Time limits are enforced. A notification appears each minute during the final five minutes. If I’m not playing with them I watch those last five minutes. Occasionally I grant a few extra minutes to finish a level, reducing friction when the session ends.
Which device (console) do I let my children game on?
As a gamer myself I own a Steam Deck and a Switch; I find tablets or phones unsuitable. Mobile games are typically free‑to‑play, riddled with ads and micro‑transactions that coerce purchases. Blocking those purchases quickly leads to boredom and whining for new titles, most of which are low‑quality junk.
Investing in a purpose‑built console is better. I’ve used both the Nintendo Switch and the Steam Deck; each can be handheld or docked to a TV.
The Switch ships ready‑to‑play with controllers and a dock; the Steam Deck requires a separate dock purchase.
The Steam Deck is pricier, but its games are often cheaper thanks to frequent sales, allowing most titles to be bought for a few euros.
I usually pick up Switch games on Marktplaats for €25‑30 each and resell titles I no longer play. Switch games retain value reasonably well, so losses are minimal.
Both consoles support separate child accounts and daily time‑limits. The Switch allows limits in 15‑minute increments; the Steam Deck only supports hourly blocks.
Which games do I let my children play?
As mentioned, games must not be overly violent and should support co‑op play.
Nintendo’s Switch library fits best. Games I’ve played with my kids include:
- Super Mario Bros Wonder
- Mario Kart
- Mario Party
- Super Mario Odyssey
- Super Mario 3D World
- Minecraft
Acquiring these titles can add up.
On the Steam Deck I gravitate toward:
Lego Games
Most Lego titles suit younger children and promote cooperation. The series spans Batman, Star Wars, Harry Potter, etc. At home we play Lego Marvel Super Heroes (parts 1 & 2), which offers mission‑based teamwork or free‑play, providing endless variety.
Lego City Undercover is a standout: it’s not tied to another franchise and is fully voiced in Dutch, ideal for kids who can’t read subtitles yet.
Cuphead
I love Cuphead’s art, soundtrack, and challenging gameplay. It’s a two‑player game, but its difficulty makes it less suitable for younger kids; I enjoy showing off my skill to my kids when I finally defeat a boss.
Goat Simulator
The deliberately ugly graphics are a turn‑off for adults, but kids adore jumping with a jet‑pack‑equipped goat onto trampolines and into pools.
Untitled Goose Game
Play as mischievous geese wreaking havoc in an English village. Kids find endless hilarity in pranks like stealing a terrified boy’s glasses and tossing them into a river—educational value aside, it’s pure fun.
It Takes Two
This title requires two players, forcing collaboration. The story (an adult couple turned into fabric dolls) is largely lost on kids because it’s fully in English, but the cooperative puzzles spark occasional sibling squabbles that resolve into shared triumphs.
Most of these games are also available on Switch, albeit generally at higher prices.
Conclusion
Gaming is a hobby I can share with my children. When I stay involved and set clear boundaries, gaming can positively influence their development.